Lately a number of people have been telling me that my positive energy rubs off. That means a LOT to me. It matters. I want to be a positive, loving force in the world. I even received a Love note from one of my colleagues half a country away! Wow.
I mean . WOW! that took courage for her to write and to know that I would receive it exactly the way she intended. Thank you KB!
I mean . WOW! that took courage for her to write and to know that I would receive it exactly the way she intended. Thank you KB!
It would be easy to assume that I was born positive or "up". I suppose that I was. I could self-amuse. Be made happy by stepping in a puddle or eating jello. Had parents who adored me. BUT...
If you knew me as a kid, a teen, a 20-something, you may or may not recall that I threw fits. I was a bit of a firecracker--prone to the odd explosion with so many things acting as matches. To say my moods were "up and down" would be understating it. A LOT. (Ask my sister: as teens, I kicked her hard enough in the arm to break her wrist.)
Lucky for me, she forgave me and we love each other. Here's proof:
A few years later, a wise boss, Carol Hyams, told me that I needed to smooth myself out for the sake of others. She had seen me practically immolate a vendor over a difference of opinion. Carol later explained that not everyone wants their hair set on fire (or wrist broken)--that sometimes a breath, some empathy and gentle words are all it takes to stop the emotional backdraft and see the other's perspective.
Hunh.
After that, I learned to pay more attention to the mercury of my interior world so that I could not only see inside or outside myself more clearly, but inside others. I got good at inhaling oxygen away from my internal sparks so that they didn't ignite emotional dust bunnies or self doubt. I got a grip. And I got curious about how fear and love wrestle inside us. I became a lion tamer.
Still a passionate person, I'm also a lot easier to be around. I've learned to channel that crazy tempestuous life-force in service to others rather than merely to light fires and watch them burn.
I am so lucky to have worked for Carol. That she had the guts and level of care to tell me the tough truth. That I could hear her because I respected and liked her tremendously (still do). Carol speaking her truth fundamentally changed who I became--who I am. Her courage changed my life.
Now, that's a hero isn't it? A hero is someone who chooses to step into a dangerous situation for the sake of another's well being? Well, Carol is my hero. In a very real way, she saved my life with her everyday courage. Now, I am able to help others, and be a more positive force myself.
Are you noticing something that could really help someone else but you are afraid of telling them--don't want to hurt their feelings? Maybe consider how a little everyday courage could really transform things. Sure, they might get mad at you. But what if they really listen? What's possible then?
Are you noticing something that could really help someone else but you are afraid of telling them--don't want to hurt their feelings? Maybe consider how a little everyday courage could really transform things. Sure, they might get mad at you. But what if they really listen? What's possible then?
